The Circle

For the past two years I have been calling my circle using spirit animals. This year my studies are focused on the Shamanic Journey and spirit guides, so calling my circle has become on even more meaningful to me as I have gained more insights into the world of spirit animals. I had settled with ease on the guides for three of the directions but had a bit more difficulty finding the right guide for West, which is the direction of water. Last year I finally settled on the Seahorse because I have always like seahorses and because they embody the duality of sexuality. It's a bit of a challenge to keep from chuckling when calling seahorse into a circle of such mighty totems such as Owl, Deer and Phoenix, yet I persevere. While studying for class the other night, I came across the meaning of seahorse and had a powerful aha moment when I read what Christopher Penczak wrote about seahorse. He wrote that seahorse stands for fidelity in relationships. No wonder I chose this funny little creature! Fidelity, the quality of being faithful and loyal. Loyal, to be strongly supportive of another. These words are how I define all of my most important relationships. When I believe in someone and see the good, I embrace fidelity. Finding this definitive meaning of seahorse caused me to look at my other circle spirit animals as they relate to who I am. I was then able to see the complete picture. The spirit of the Deer was chosen to bring into my circle and my life, the qualities of patience and gentleness. The Owl, for wisdom and trust in the inner voice. The Phoenix for the quality of passion and the belief in rebirth and regeneration. The Seahorse for fidelity. This combination of energies are me. They are what I strive to embrace in their perfect form, even when I use these energies in imperfect ways.
The average person has no idea what the study of witchcraft really entails. They imagine it's all about ceremony, spell casting and wearing funny hats. The truth is that the study of witchcraft is first and foremost about the mastery of self. With self discovery, comes the power to transform one's life into something of real substance. As humans we often run away from relationships, jobs, and places out of a sense of boredom and a need for constant stimulation, all of which is in reality, a means of escaping ourselves. If we are constantly on the run, or immersing our minds in escapist literature, entertainment and such, we don't have to examine our lives. The restless soul is one that does not know itself.  Building a solid foundation within yourself, leads to building foundations with people that are right for you. New experiences enrich our lives and broaden our perspectives. These experiences teach us by taking us out of our every day habits, thus helping us to better define our likes and dislikes. I like to travel and love to revisit places I like because I can deepen the experience by learning even more about a place. When I leave again in November on my next trip, it will be my fifth trip out of state in a year. All of these trips have been two or more weeks away. By now, I look at Portland as my second home, as I do with San Diego. My real home though, is with the love I have for certain people and creatures, so no place, no matter how awesome it is, will ever satisfy me as much as true connections do. That is something I have always known about myself. I find my sense of peace in love.
My Gemini husband has roamed the world this past year (South Africa, Europe, Canada and Mexico) along with his domestic travel, which in total means he is gone at least 48 weeks out of the year. His work through the years has taken him from one client to another, each client lasting no more than two years. He likes the travel and different circumstances each client brings, yet he never becomes bored with living where we do or in the relationship he has with me.
 Everyone must be free to walk their path no matter where it takes them either physically or spiritually. My path has been a strongly spiritual one for several years now. It has taught me much not only about myself, but also about love as well. You can love in absence, bless the path they are on, and sincerely want it to bring them what they seek in life, even if you were wrong in thinking that you would continue to be part of that person's path. When my clients lament the seemingly lost relationship with their soul mates, I can offer little to console them, because when in fact you do meet up with a member of your soul tribe,whether it be in the form of friend or lover, you are supposed to be together with them. You reunite in a lifetime to complete some previous lessons and from there enjoy the fruits of that hard labor, together. Our souls don't seek or recognize another tribe member from previous reincarnations, only to do a "hit and run" encounter. If we believe in ancient stardust, we know that we have been recycled many times and therefore have many soul mates, yet in the span of this short human life, there is only so much time to reconnect and enjoy, so we are drawn to only a select few. However, when soul and ego are vastly unbalanced, problems arise and separation is inevitable. No one can predict the possibility of a reunion because the future is not written.  My only answer therefore, is to repeat what I just wrote earlier. You can love them in absence and truly bless the path that they travel and wish for them to find what they seek. Never lose your own sense of wonder and do what makes your soul jump up and down.